When I awoke my least favorite acquaintance in the world was using racial slurs.  He had acquired a Mardi Gras girlfriend and they had got into an argument with some black people.  Andy was telling him to shut his mouth and get out of the room.

“I’m just telling you what we said,” said Mike.

I did not want to open my eyes and it was coming at me like a dark but hilarious radio play.  “Look, I won’t call all of them that,” said Mike.

“I don’t want to wake up and hear that word or ever hear it,” said Andy.

“You’re ruining my morning,” I said.  I opened my eyes.  “How did you get all of those?” I asked.  Mike had the enormous type of beads that you could only get with money or by showing your breasts to people.

“I showed my dick to some guys,” said Mike.  “So what,” he said.  He had the giant marijuana leaf kind and the kind that lit up, starting all the way up at his jaw line and spilling out to his shoulders.  

There was nothing we could say to make it better.  The awful girl who had encouraged Mike to use the racial slurs had gone out of our lives forever.  We would be driving home later and I had a very good spot on the bed.

My hand was covered in gauze.